Relationship Test: The Truth in your Relationship
There are several reasons why people cross the threshold of starting a relationship. Majority of people reason out that they are driven by love. They search for happiness, make commitment, and live a happy life with their partners. Others may be only motivated by lust. They are not truly in love; most of the time they are not satisfied.
Despite the many reasons, only true relationships can last. Some people who could not find true love in relationships unfortunately end up getting hurt. If you are one of the people who are badly hurt and confused today, do not let realization come too late.
To test whether or not you are going out with right person today, take the relationship test. The relationship test is a type of self-administered psychological test that aims to determine if you are likely to get hurt in the relationship you have today. It will also help figure out whether or not your partner is the right one for you.
The relationship test is basically composed of 20 questions, inspired by Dr. Joseph Carver’s article entitled, “Are you Dating a Loser? Identifying Losers, Controllers and Abusers.”
Relationship Test Questionnaire
The following is a sample psychological test developed by Dr. Joseph Carver together with Dr. Greg Mulhauser. Reflect on the sentences below and rate them based on your experience your partner’s behavior.
1. My partner has physically hurt me on purpose.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
2. Within 4 weeks of dating, my partner professed love and intention for me to make a lifelong commitment
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
3. My partner ‘blows up’ or gets angry very rapidly, subsequently engaging in dangerous behaviors like driving too fast, breaking things, or threatening other people.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
4. My partner chips away at my confidence, putting me down and correcting my slightest mistakes.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
5. My partner has tried to reduce or eliminate my contact with other friends and family.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
6. My partner cycles between being ‘mean’ and being ‘sweet’ to me.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
7. My partner blames me for his or her anger, and avoids taking responsibility for his or her own actions.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
8. My partner panics at any indication of breaking-up.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
9. My partner discourages me from pursuing outside interests, unless he or she accompanies me.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
10. My partner checks up on my activities, keeping track of where I go and who I am with.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
11. My partner calls me names or verbally attacks me in public.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
12. My partner tries to convince me that I am not quite good enough, or that I am lucky to have someone who will tolerate a person like me.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
13. My partner seems to feel entitled to have whatever he or she desires.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
14. My friends and family have indicated to me that they don’t like the way my partner treats me.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
15. My partner tells stories about past events in which he or she has been violent, aggressive, or insensitive to others.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
16. My partner treats other individuals of my gender, such as clerks and waitress dispassionately – in a way that I would not want to be treated.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
17. My partner seems to have two distinct reputations, with some people singing him or her praises and others warning me about his or her behavior.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
18. My partner leaves me feeling constantly on edge — walking on eggshells — for fear that saying or doing the wrong thing will elicit a severe reaction.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
19. My partner considers the opinions or feelings of others to be worthless compared to his or her own.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
20. My partner leaves me feeling as if I’m “going crazy,” becoming paranoid, or otherwise acting out of my normal character in an effort to defend myself against his or her behavior.
- _rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never
- _sometimes (1-2 days per week)
- _occasionally (3-4 days per week)
- _often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time
How to score the test
The relationship test does not intend to give a prediction if your relationship will fail. However, it helps you understand if your partner is experiencing some sorts of problems related to personality disorder, which can possibly hurt you at the end.
Use the corresponding points for each of the choices to score your answers from numbers 1-20.
- rarely (less than 1 day per week) or never – 0
- sometimes (1-2 days per week)– 1
- occasionally (3-4 days per week)– 2
- often (5-7 days per week) or all of the time – 3
The following are the interpretations of results based on your answers.
- If your score is 0-4, your level of experience with hurtful relationship is low. You may be experiencing a satisfactory relationship with the absence of personality disorder symptoms from your partner. Your partner is inspired by love to be able to make a happy commitment with you. However, it is still important to monitor undesirable behaviors from time to time.
- If your score is 5-18, your level of experience with hurtful relationship is moderate. Your may be experiencing some sort of undesirable behaviors from your partner that can be linked to personality disorder.
- If your score is 19-47, your level of experience with hurtful relationship is high. You have experienced numerous undesirable behaviors from your partner, which can be linked to personality disorder. For more than occasionally, your partner’s undesirable behaviors have caused troubles in your relationship, which also caused you to get hurt.
A relationship in this kind of situation has a high possibility of failure.
- If your score is 48-120, your level of experience with hurtful relationship is very high. Most likely, you are experiencing troubles with your partner, which can be linked to personality disorder. Most of the times, you get hurt by his or her actions. A relationship in this kind of situation has a very high possibility of failure.
This psychology test only measures your level of experience with hurtful relationship to determine its possible outcome. Knowing how much trouble you have had with your partner will make you see whether or not your partner is affected by personality disorder. For a happy relationship, maybe you are already dating the right person.
